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Consider asking your partner to accompanying you when you go.

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It’s a good idea to be open about what your needs are and to always keep the communication open.

Talk to a healthcare provider if you are worried something you want to try could be physically or sexually dangerous. “One of the barriers for communication is that the language is either really goofy-sounding or clinical,” says Emily Lindin of OMGYes, an organization focused on communicating about women’s sexual pleasure. Carli Blau points out, “Two partners who are sexually involved with one another ultimately want to pleasure each other.”Consider tapping into erotic stimulation from entertainment, if you still can’t find the words or time to say what you want.

“Watching movies is a great way to facilitate conversations with your partner,” says Cynthia Loyst, creator of Find Your Pleasure and a co-host of CTV’s The Social. ’” Loyst reminds that the spirit of conversations like these should be openness and curiosity, not judgement.

It’s also worth getting past the discomfort to talk about health, particularly sexually transmitted infections (STIs) and birth control.

Avoiding these vital conversations might be endangering your health and altering the future you’d hoped for.

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